- 20th August 2012
- Posted by: Rosalind Howard
- Category: NL Week
You will have a CEO – the Chief Executive Officer, whose main purpose is to deliver results, you will have a CFO – the Chief Financial Officer, whose main purpose is to report on those results, and you will have a CCO – the chief Confusion Officer, whose main purpose is to make everything as complex and hard to understand, as possible.
You may have a few – but who is the best of the best, the holder of the elevated title “Chief?”
* They will know a lot of TLAs (Three Letter Acronyms) – many of which they have invented themselves.
* They will use trendy, meaningless phrases like “talent acquisition” (instead of “recruitment”).
* And their favourite words, above all others, will be “that is too simplistic” – CCO’s hate anything simple, because such things threaten their very existence.
Having spent years in Information Technology, I am as “guilty” as anyone else in using jargon and accepting it as part of the everyday lexicon (!) – the first term I heard when I went into telecoms was “twisted pair” (don’t ask), I well remember being told with absolute disdain by a consultant that “knowledge management” was “the management of knowledge” and my personal favourite, although I have never met one, is a “thin client”.
And what about the CCO who wrote this for their web-site?
“Cartus’ customized solutions boost employee productivity and satisfaction, while supporting effective program management and cost control. Our focus on service excellence, technology investment, and Six Sigma measurement standards ensures consistent results-driven performance. Clients receive continual information on best practices, cost-reduction opportunities, and competitive program enhancements, while our consultants provide each employee with resourceful and responsive personal advocacy.”
So, next time someone uses a word, phrase or anything that you don’t think everyone in the room understands, simply ask – “I’m sorry, what does that mean please?”
The room will go very quiet and you will be the centre of attention for a few uncomfortable moments.
Trust me, if you don’t know what they meant, very few people will, and you will be a hero.
The question is this – dare you?
Please let me and others know below
With my heartfelt feelings of positive emotion, and every good fortune, favour and fortitude.